I’m a very flitty sort of person, and can be pushed off balance decently easily. My job is pretty fast paced, so I can’t just go for a walk or meditate for 10 minutes. So my rule is to not focus on everything coming up, but just focus on what’s directly in front of me. Which, yeah, I know sounds dumb but it honestly does work.

Instead of thinking “Oh, that line of customers is long” -> “Oh god I’m not going to be able to serve the customers fast enough” -> “oh my god they’re going to leave and I’m going to get in trouble for not being fast enough.”

I don’t even acknowledge the length of the line. Look directly ahead, and focus on what you’re doing right now. Shit will always be coming in from every direction, but quick steps make for shorter journeys.

Outside of work, hobbies, crochet, gardening. Getting in touch with nature is a big one for me.

What? You don’t hear a one to one recreation of cracking 5 glowsticks in your hand when you jerk off?

I was only on forums as a little kid myself. Trust me, I’m Very Young, I was just good with computers young. But the notifications, small scale, it gave me a little tickle that I hadn’t felt since those silly days of logging onto Pokemon forums as a kid.

I’ve never been super active on Reddit myself. Hell, I’ve probably written more comments on here in the past day or two than I did over a few years on Reddit. So I can’t accurately describe the culture change to you. I’m sure there’s plenty of older folk who would be able to tell you though.

But it’s something I haven’t felt for a while, and something I had forgotten myself. Where social media is… An active choice? On Reddit, it was easy to be entirely passive. Just scroll and scroll. And really, it wasn’t even making me happy. It was just engagement for the sake of being engaged. But if I’m on a smaller forum I love talking with people! Sharing these experiences. Also, yay for having forum tools again!! I missed being able to post pictures in comments.

Honestly yeah, that’s a much more accurate and eloquent way of describing how I felt. Thank you.

I suppose it’s just… Nice to see actual conversation. If someone is trying to be funny, they’re actually trying, not pulling on some dead horse one liner.

I feel like that has meaning. Genuine meaning. It’s something I didn’t feel with the endless barrage of Reddit.

I look forward to it, genuinely, I do. But… Your inexperience is a bit obvious. Good luck!

Ehhh, I’ve been around for long enough to kinda be scared off by vague proposals… Having a solid idea of what you want, how you’re going to do it, why you want it, and who would be involved is a prerequisite in my eyes. I’m all for community led communities. But without something solid and specific, there’s no real reason to trust you.

I really don’t mean this as an insult. I can tell that you do have a vision here. But, without details and genuine work. No one else will see your vision. Especially if your vision is built off of collaboration. It sounds backwards, but trust me on this. No one will share the same passion for your projects as you do. You have to find a way to get people on board with YOU and working with you. Otherwise there’s no reason they couldn’t just go off and do what you’re saying, sans you.

Hmm… I might be on board, but reading through this your proposal seems far too vague? I can understand you’re not trying to be beehaw. And that you’re trying to do your own thing. But can you elaborate on the differences?

I absolutely agree on your point about people wanting to turn lemmy into Reddit. Everyone has some very clear problems with Reddit, so why do we just want to create it again??

And again, some communities are going to have to migrate. And they’ll likely hold the same culture they did on Reddit, and just… Writing this, I realise that I sound like an old man who hates people. But I just find huge forums or social media groups with thousands upon thousands of people to be EXHAUSTING. The culture, the social dance of it all.

And I want to escape that from Reddit. The main stream of Reddit felt like a secondary rat race to my actual life. No substance, just astroturfing and attention traps. I don’t want another Reddit, I don’t want another time sink for the toilet. I want genuine discussions and the good hearted fun of old forums…

Haha, sorry, going to continue to yap off until my jaw simply falls off my face.

Honestly, I think this is the point where we have to do our best in making a good community. The application process for beehaw is fantastic. And maybe I’m just mean but I hope to see many more application based communities. Say what you will about gatekeeping. But sometimes asking people to do more than the bare minimum is necessary to making a good community. And sometimes a good community doesn’t have to involve everyone that so much as glanced over.

Totally agree. Notifications on lemmy genuinely excite me. On Reddit, more than half the time it was an empty comment that added nothing to the conversation. Or admin mail.

Like, even just as I scroll down this thread, everyone is writing full and proper responses. Not just one liners as far as the eye can see. It’s refreshing and exciting. How the internet aught to be.

To add onto your point. One thing that we’ll have to watch out for is that toxic clout culture built up on other websites coming here.

It’s been something I’ve been thinking about in the context of all this. People aren’t coming from the void. They’ll have their own internet lingo and culture that they’ll bring with them to any site they go to. And while the design of a website can mitigate some of the worst parts of a culture, it can’t outright remove it.

Without near constant vigilance (like the ask a historian subreddit) most communities will end up dying off. And even then you’re at the whims of the platform.

I realise my point now is hardly even connected to yours, haha. Apologies.

Reminding myself that the person posting the worst opinions I’ve seen in my life is likely a 14 year-old with unrestricted access to the internet from birth is the only thing keeping me sane.

Saaame. But I like it when it’s genuinely bad. Not just some tiktok of some content farm adding cheese to cheese to cheese.

Before you are two paths. One is cracking that hog. The other is becoming a cranky mod. Choose wisely.