k

Removed by mod

I don’t know what to do about it.

1. Roll over. Do nothing. Accept that your wife is an addict and doesn’t care enough about you to even try to quit smoking when you’ve made it an issue.

2. Pester her to quit.

3. Ask for couples therapy.

4. Seperate/Divorce

Those are literally your only options. You do nothing or you do something. In either case, you’ve got to address it if you want to do anything about it.

We really do have a great relationship otherwise

Do you? You said that you wouldn’t have married a smoker and you still refuse to. She is relying on a crutch that is killing her and causing harm to your own health. You’ve asked her to do something about it. She won’t. This isn’t like her passtime is knitting or something. It’s a money sink that is detrimental to the health of everyone involved and everyone around it. She’s more willing to poison herself than even consider quitting. Is that really a great relationship?

She spent 5 years without attempting to make headway on something that is disgusting, makes the area smell disgusting, makes her smell disgusting, will stain skin and teeth, harms her and reduces her life span, harms her partner and reduces his lifepan when he DOESN’T CONSENT, and harms their relationship. She is UNQUESTIONABLY an asshole. You do not have a leg to stand on. Your arguments are just “Oh but she might need it to cope.”

I don’t care.

She is an addict and is refusing to budge. As someone who went from a pack every two days to nothing, and as someone who went from drinking half a pint of vodka everyday to nothing, I can categorically say she is an asshole. If she is outright refusing, as OP said, then she is in the wrong. She is choosing addiction over her relationship. She’s not just an asshole. She’s a horrible person and her love for OP is genuinely questionable.

You do not get a pass from being an asshole simply because you have an addiction. At first? Sure. But she has been doing it for 5 YEARS and after being talked to about it she’s doing nothing. She no longer gets the umbrella of empathy for her addiction and she should be called out for it. She’s being selfish and putting her own wants over the health of everyone involved.

They’ve been smoking for 5 years straight with OP openly disapproving of the situation. I’m not seeing the “Yes, you’re the asshole” here. If this was for a brief period then sure. But 5 years is just beyond the pale. Half a decade of someone disapproving of smoking and they haven’t found a single opportunity to quit?

No.

You privately set a limit with not marrying a smoker. You made that stance public years later after she had already quit. She knew about that stance. She begins smoking again. Understandable, addicts will relapse. However, relapsing for 5 years straight? When you know it bothers your partner and ACTIVELY contributes to not just a detriment to their health but yours as well? They haven’t found a single opportunity to quit? Even for a brief period.

They’re the asshole. If this was for a year, nah. Needs more information. But 5 YEARS STRAIGHT? She’s not respecting your boundaries or your health.

My knowledge of the healing process of grabbing a skin flap is pretty limited but yeah, I’d assume so. Just with some scarring/visible sign that a skin graft was removed or added.

Phalloplasty. When they’re custom making you a dick they need the skin from somewhere. There are a couple places to take it from but one is the forearm.

I wear a chain with a padlock around my neck, that’s not enough?

Mine does. Usually more so in one month than any others.

Apparently it’s a real name but as to why you’d choose it… no fucking clue. Not unless he’s in a school with people named Tanner, Tucker, Bartholomew and Rupert Shitgrain Esquire

You and me both

Now I’m sad

It makes me exceptionally sad. Probably a combination of knowing more about the period of his life he made those paintings and from just seeing a good boy all alone.

We Canadians took them and turned them into more islands

I tried it.

That was what first came to mind for me too. I know that all my trans homies didn’t suddenly pop into W40k one day all at once, but from my perspective that’s kinda what happened. My naive ass suddenly went ‘Oh!’ when I was at a games shop one day and realized that like 4 of the regulars that I saw were trans. I mean you’d have thought that the trans flag pins and shit were a hint but nope. My brain was just like “Fuck yea, more allies!” lmao