It’s practical, I swear!

One Riker, one bridge!

They work better if you don’t fuck them.

I keep forgetting that Gmail is a website and not just an IMAP server.

Body odour does hinder reproduction, though.

Another galaxy, another time.

The Old Republic was the Republic of legend, greater than distance or time. No need to note where it was or whence it came, only to know that… it was the Republic.

Once, under the wise rule of the Senate and the protection of the Jedi Knights, the Republic throve and grew. But as often happens when wealth and power pass beyond the admirable and attain the awesome, then appear those evil ones who have greed to match.

So it was with the Republic at its height. Like the greatest of trees, able to withstand any external attack, the Republic rotted from within though the danger was not visible from outside.

Aided and abetted by restless, power-hungry individuals within the government, and the massive organs of commerce, the ambitious Senator Palpatine caused himself to be elected President of the Republic. He promised to reunite the disaffected among the people and to restore the remembered glory of the Republic.

Once secure in office he declared himself Emperor, shutting himself away from the populace. Soon he was controlled by the very assistants and boot-lickers he had appointed to high office, and the cries of the people for justice did not reach his ears.

Having exterminated through treachery and deception the Jedi Knights, guardians of justice in the galaxy, the Imperial governors and bureaucrats prepared to institute a reign of terror among the disheartened worlds of the galaxy. Many used the Imperial forces and the name of the increasingly isolated Emperor to further their own personal ambitions.

But a small number of systems rebelled at these new outrages. Declaring themselves opposed to the New Order they began the great battle to restore the Old Republic.

From the beginning they were vastly outnumbered by the systems held in thrall by the Emperor. In those first dark days it seemed certain the bright flame of resistance would be extinguished before it could cast the light of new truth across a galaxy of oppressed and beaten peoples…

Introduction to the original Star Wars novelization from 1976. Of course, basically every piece of media since The Empire Strikes Back ignores the whole “isolated Emperor” bit.

From the corner of his eye, he saw Threepio stiffen. “I hope I didn’t offend you, sir,” the droid said anxiously. “That was certainly not my intent.”

“You didn’t offend me,” Luke assured him. “As a matter of fact, you might have just delivered Ben’s last lesson to me.”

“I beg your pardon?”

Luke sipped at his drink. “Governments and entire planets are important, Threepio. But when you sift everything down, they’re all just made up of people.”

There was a brief pause. “Oh,” Threepio said.

“In other words,” Luke amplified, “a Jedi can’t get so caught up in matters of galactic importance that it interferes with his concern for individual people.” He looked at Threepio and smiled. “Or for individual droids.”

“Oh. I see, sir.” Threepio cocked his head toward Luke’s cup. “Forgive me, sir… but may I ask what that is that you’re drinking?”

If space was a vacuum then Roger Wilco would be out of work.

It’s pronounced “someBODY”.

The Dragon Quest method.

They’re actually parodying the song from the end of season 3 of Reboot.

I bought an electric clipper and started cutting my own hair during COVID so I don’t have to worry about that anymore.

I’ve heard that they’re going to have fireworks shows all across Canada to celebrate.

The US will delay their fireworks shows until the 4th, presumably so that they can spend the previous three days not pooping.

I would’ve thought that was obvious.

I’m probably going to start using Reddit again when the blackout ends and keep using it until the end of the month, but once RIF stops working I don’t see myself going back. The way I see it, the last couple of days have been a nice stress-test period for Lemmy, but the real exodus will start in July.

Is that why the mobile app is called “Jerboa”?

Nah. I never liked using centralized monoliths like Reddit and other social media sites but stayed there due to lack of alternatives. I’m glad to see a federated network like Lemmy getting enough activity that I can ditch Reddit.