OP went through a functional assessment and/or rehab as a kid without being told what it was

It does!

Granny swigs from a bottle of Jack, because she likes to party hearty

This is what I’ve been taught as well.

Username checks out, assuming KSP stands for Kerbal Space Program

Then it follows to reason that a group of pan people going clubbing is a Panic! at the Disco

Usually? No.

But I’ve seen more than one hotel gym with carpet.

Yeah, but digital ones are byte size

impregnated

Does their depravity know no bounds?!

Why are missiles the same size as grenades/knives

They’re fun size.

why does he fly like a weird bird

He’s emulating our great national symbol, the eagle.

if that child is on such a flammable box spring, why isn’t it alight?

If you look, this is moments before impact. The bed won’t be on fire until the munitions actually hit the target.

There’s a lot that goes into river velocities. What slows rivers down is primarily friction, so a wide, shallow channel will move slower because there’s a lot of drag along the bottom and banks. Having debris, like plants, rocks, or boulders also creates more drag to slow the water down.

A deep river will move faster, because the depth makes a ‘fast lane’ for water to slip over/between the slower water along the bottom and banks.

The horrors persist, but so do I.

People don’t get particularly competitive over talking.

Excuse me, have you seen the internet?

The avian equivalent of giving yourself a pep talk in the mirror before a date.

I’m so bisexual, my oven is an air fryer

Pretend to be something you’re not

In my life, I was Noel Gruber who worked at Taco Bell in Uranium City, Saskatchewan. But in my dreams I played a different role. I was Monique Gibeau in post-war France! A hooker, with a heart of black charcoal.

Some of them look like Grove Snails, and they do climb to aestivate.

I need some better stompy boots, but I don’t know where to even start looking. My daily wear look like normal hiking boots, but they’re steel toe and have an anti-nail steel plate in the sole. I’d like those features in a stompy boot, for maximum stomp.

My partner and I are nominally poly, but it fell apart last time. Basically, the metamour got a good job in another state, and my partner wants to stay here to care for his aging parents.

I wish the closest pool was cheaper and not half an hour’s drive away. It’s supposed to be good for your joints, and lord do I need it.