Adam: Hey Lilith, I’m in charge, god says so!
Lilith: Lol, no.
God: Actually, yes.
Lilith: Fuck that I’m gone.
Adam: Well, shit. Can you make me a more subservient breeder please Lord?
God: Yep.
Eve: Uhhh…
Adam: Hey Eve, I’m in charge, god says so!
Eve…right…
God: He is.
Eve…
Satan: Hey, Eve, you know the fruit on that tree that god told you would kill you if you ate it?
Eve: Yep.
Satan: It won’t. But what it will do is give you knowledge like science and the arts. But its totally your call if you choose to eat it.
Eve: Oh wow, nice!
Adam: WTF Eve!
Eve: Fine, don’t eat, stay dumb
Adam: OK, I’ll have some.
God: Even though I’m omniscient and omnipotent it somehow escaped me where you both were and what you were up to. Anyway, fruit = bad because knowledge like science and art is bad. Get out.
Christians - Satan is clearly the bad guy here.
Could be, sure. But the real question is, why did god make knowledge forbidden? I’ll quote Satan directly (via John Milton):