Hakita is the ULTRAKILL dev, Rick is the Celeste player.

John McAfee is the only person I genuinely believe may have successfully faked his own death.

I stand by my points but I was kind of being an ass in my first reply, sorry about that. Some of these are super valid complaints that I can agree with. In particular,

the difficulty is down, and i’m at the very start of the game.

Yeah fair enough the combat doesn’t pop off until you get a handful of perk points invested, and the first 20 guns you pick up are going to be garbage. This never turned anyone off of Borderlands, but fair enough.

skyrim is also an awful fucking game whose popularity boggles me, and its influence on the entire genre has been a detriment

Full agree

“to see the different life paths and try different builds” and nothing appeared to be any different, save the first 20 minutes being weirdly disjointed from the rest of the story (i was supposed to steal a car to clear my buddy’s debt? then suddenly there’s a “best friends forever” montage with jackie and nether my buddy nor his predicament are ever mentioned again?)

This is and will forever be my biggest and most vocal complaint about the game since release day. Different life paths give about a handful of unique dialogues apiece that often don’t do much of anything, and the opening montage deal is the most frustrating thing CDPR has ever handed us I think.

idk about you but im of the philosophy that a game, especially an open-world player-driven game as cp2077 is so frequently described to me, should have a toy that’s fun to play with regardless if you’re using it to play the game or not.

Yeah agreed on that front. Your options are largely limited to sidequesting. Kind of lame I guess, but I never noticed it that much when I was playing the game because I don’t often do that sort of messing around anyway, personally.

…On the points where we disagree, though, I think we’re just kind of ideologically opposed to some things and I don’t even really understand why. I get the feeling that you just may not be the intended audience honestly. On my first time playing, as a long time fan of the likes of Shadowrun and other tabletop sci-fi-rpg’s, I thought the setup and execution of the Konpeki Plaza Heist was one of the greatest adaptations of a proper tabletop cyberpunk run gone bad that I have ever seen in a video game, and I think it might be some of CDPR’s best work they’ve ever done. I was in awe. Very little of the rest of the game lives up to what Konpeki Plaza promised until you get to Phantom Liberty and that’s the one complaint that I agree with most when people say that the game is a rug pull. Konpeki illustrates the vision of a tabletop Cyberpunk run that CDPR intended for the entirety of this game, and the only other parts of the game that somewhat approach that same vision in my opinion are some of the companion quests (Judy, Panam, River, Etc) and Phantom Liberty.

You don’t seem to have enjoyed Konpeki at all but I find it quite a shame that the rest of the game wasn’t more like Konpeki. To each their own I guess. I like this game. There are definitely valid complaints to be made about it but I don’t think it deserves to be called garbage. I do think it was rushed out the door and Phantom Liberty gives a better idea of what the developers actually intended the game to be like, given the time they needed to actually cook on it. Hopefully next time they release a game it’ll be one that’s given the proper time it needs.

Man there is so much to unpack here.

janky “bullet sponge” combat

Turn down the difficulty or make a build that isn’t ass, nearly every build can one shot enemies on Hard if you aren’t just shotgunning perk points at random perks at all times

awful vehicles

Most of the cars look great but driving gameplay isn’t CDPR’s strong suit, I’ll grant you that

fugly characters

Turn up your graphics settings

invincible enemies bc they clipped into the ground AGAIN

Literally never had this problem once

bad voice acting

You might be the only person with this opinion, I can agree with you in regards to Johnny, this doesn’t apply to almost anyone else in the game

distinct lack of player agency

In what manner, exactly? V is railroaded down the story somewhat, but I challenge you to find an RPG where that isn’t the case, only one I can think of is Kenshi and that game literally doesn’t have a storyline.

feeling of being constantly harassed whenever i try to get my bearings for a second

Honestly have no idea what you’re talking about, please elaborate

fake dialog trees

What does this even mean?

fake options in the fake dialog trees (ie nice and mean options presented, upon picking nice the character says the nice thing, then follows it up with the mean thing)

Oh no, God forbid you have a dialogue option that gives you, you know, dialogue instead of just having an “Accept Quest” button attached to the NPC

misleading options in the fake dialog trees (character line does not match menu option at all)

Examples? If you’re just complaining that the dialogue selection tree doesn’t tell you your entire line of dialogue ahead of time, that’s silly, and also there is a mod to change that.

poor level design

You are the only person to hold this opinion that I’ve ever met

ludicrous amounts of padding in every dialog

See previously, Oh no, God forbid you have a dialogue option that gives you, you know, dialogue instead of just having an “Accept Quest” button attached to the NPC

poor environment design language

“color vomit” aesthetic (as opposed to having a color palette)

I’m sticking these two together because they’re similarly nonsensical, Night City has incredible environmental design sometimes on the level of Fromsoft games, and the game has an incredibly obvious red-dominated color palette when it isn’t giving way to the interesting and correctly multicolored city outside of the immediate threat of Arasaka boot. The color language used in the game is supportive of its themes and quite well implemented in my opinion.

awful stealth mechanics

I wouldn’t call 'em great, but they’re more in depth than 90% of other RPGs with a stealth gameplay option. Do you prefer the Skyrim style of “you’re invisible if you’re crouching”? Because if so you’re just wrong.

shit gunplay

Absolutely insane take, the gunplay is on par or better than any other FPS I’ve played other than Titanfall or Destiny

broken control configurator (m+kb back then, gamepad today)

Don’t know what you’re talking about, I played with M+K on launch and I played again on controller after the release of Phantom Liberty, never had a problem.

lack of any engaging “toys” to play with in the “sandbox” of night city

Unsure what you mean by this, but if you explain it a bit this might be one of the few things on this list I might totally agree with you on. There isn’t much to do out in the city other than quests, or hunting for loot in tucked away corners or on rooftops. I still got 120+ hours of gameplay from just doing that though.

lack of a “skip intro” option for successive playthroughs (though im told the dlc includes one. so very pro-consumer of them to put it behind a fucking paywall.)

It got old after the 4th or 5th time through it, sure, but if you’re raring to skip Konpeki Plaza to get to “the real game” then you have completely missed the entire artistic purpose of the game. This is like being Big Mad that you can’t start Final Fantasy 7 at the point where you escape Midgar. Have some appreciation for an extremely well constructed classic cyberpunk mission gone bad that sets up 100 hours of further storyline. The Konpeki Plaza heist is by a long shot the coolest part of the entire game up until you get into Phantom Liberty.

No kidding.

Some of Johnny’s lines fall flat and I think Silverhand might be one of Keanu Reeves’ worst performances of his career.

Everyone else though? I have a hard time saying it’s some of the best voice acting and dialogue I’ve ever seen, because Clair Obscur exists, but it’s up there. Takemura in particular was one that struck me, when’s the last time you met a Japanese man in an English voice acted video game that actually has a thick Japanese accent? It fits his character well and was a design choice that many developers would have been afraid to make. Not only did CDPR make that choice, they worked around it well and were even bold enough to make this voice one of the main characters that the plot revolves around, and it works well.

OP made this whole thread to come in and complain that “this massively popular game that millions of people love is garbage, actually” and then when some of those millions of people come in to ask what this is all about and try to defend their opinion, they’re hit with “no you’re delusional” and lies about the state of the game

This is also how I discovered The Heavy who is to this day one of my favorite bands that somehow no one I speak to has ever heard of

Hah, I thought Cyberpunk was one of his worst performances in his career. There are a small handful of dialogues where he really nails it but 90% of Johnny’s dialogue feels so phoned in. I guess that was probably an intentional design decision for the character but it ended up just being kind of crap, IMO.

malicious rattling begins in the distance

American Christian temples and churches are all boring and austere because having fun or enjoying anything is a sin. They are not representative of temples as a whole, but their constituents think they are (or else think they should be).

Not to mention if these fuckers weren’t making it so goddamn difficult to get GA surgery, then maybe she wouldn’t have had to have been hanging dong in the locker room. I am quite confident that’s not something she does because she wants to.

I can’t imagine what might have given it away.

Hell yeah. I saw this yesterday when you first posted about it, immediately sent it to all my friends, and then I’ve been busy afterward.

No man can hide from the ravages of Time. It (and by extension, they) can reach you no matter where you try to hide away, corners or no.

I love those in particular just because of how absolutely inescapable they are. If the Hounds are hunting you then you’re going to be found. Period, done, end of story. You can’t exist in a place that has geometry without throwing open a door for them.

I’m sure at least one mad wizard has sealed himself inside a perfect spherical prison with no corners only to find that the Cornerhounds don’t much care what corners they come from, and your knees and elbows work just fine if better solutions aren’t available.

Man I love those. I take email addresses from customers as part of my work, and I see a hundred firstname.lastname@email.com every day.

When I see one come through that’s like BOOTYLOVER69-420@ it makes my day noticeably better. Normalize more stupid emails in business settings.

Amazon happened

If you’re already going in for the custom fit, may as well get one you’re happy with

This was one of my biggest gripes with the JK Rowling Wizarding World before Rowling herself gave me other reasons to dislike it

What used to be an enjoyable 90s temp the last few years is about to become an unenjoyable 100s+ temp in the next few years, it’s already starting