If you paint the chord in camo you can leave it there and no one would know.

It’s basically a reverse penis.

I wasn’t gonna do it, but if you got any last remarks, you better say them now Mr putin

Give me $50/month and I’ll find you some random stranger 😉💕! I used craigslist and found a perfectly good used girlfriend. 15 years and she’s still going!

Ok we gotta get this to work. But first questions first. Are you now or have you ever been a hottie? If male, is your penis at least 7.5"? These are very important questions. She’s a hottie but it doesn’t matter because you’re supposed to love me, not her. But she’s supposed to love you. Can you sign the backstreet boys songs? Or the songs from Pink? Are you a gambler but you keep your cool and regularly make a ton of money in the stock market? Anyway, as for me, I got the sad bod going. I’m not too tall, not too short, 6" penis. I’m at a good age. And I love to be loved. And I love to love. So we will definitely click. Man, this is going great 😃. So yeah, tell us which end you’ll need from me and which end she can get from you! LOL.

Sounds like a plan!

Wait this is great! I love my wife but she doesn’t love me back! So all we need to do is find a person who she loves that then loves me so we can have threesomes!

Oh can’t wait! I wonder 🤔 who this person will be!

That’s what they use to make shaving foam before they cram into cans at Gillette.

Powdered by Kickstarter!

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/digistump/oak-by-digistump-wi-fi-for-all-things-arduino-comp

This is the real oak and acorn by digistump, the shittiest microcontroller.

I believe in women’s rights and equity and equality for all types of people. That said, I found someone who makes my life interesting. Unfortunately my life is interesting in the wrong ways like half the time. It’s aging me and I will die and early death. But that’s at least an interesting life. Otherwise she doesn’t do shit. No Job, no dishes, nothing. The only and most Important things she does is to teach the kids, do their workbooks together and pay the various bills. That’s stuff I can’t ever do because I go to work. While I’m happy that she does those things, I think she better find a job after the kids become more independent. That has literally been her excuse for not having a job for the past 15 years. So when the kids are finally doing well in school on their own, I will nag her like she nags me to get the garbage out. I will nag her to go get a job. That’s my plan and I’m sticking to it because hey, she should be doing something desirable right? LOL. They cut her stomach up to get our babies out. That’s probably the next excuse, a pretty good one, until I have my last breath. And to that I say: “Whatever babe, let me watch my show”.

Does it come with balls? It would be so cool to have 4!

Hey I found this dick fair and square! It fits perfectly. But I’m still looking for a bigger one.

I am also skeptical, can we get the guy’s number so we can confirm? For a friend.

Somebody got tired of cleaning everything finally and just gave up.

Okay I read all the comments and none seem to explain enough about the subject. However all seems to indicate that upside down pineapple shorts may make it easier for a swinger to come invite us to have chocolate with them.

I thought about all the donkeys they would need.

How many days does a normal person take to heal a cut on their ear?

I think something is going on. Time to reveal that it was just ketchup!

Republicans, the ketchup is the ear party.

Or maybe the cut is really real and it becomes the new fascism symbol…the sign of the beast.

My kids have only one Filipino. The other is Mexican. Ha! We made Mexipinos!

It comes equipped with a 3" long flatbed. In case you need to carry 3" long 2x4’s from the homeless depot.

Oh crud!