• DessertStorms@kbin.social
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    2
    ·
    1 year ago

    I’m not sure if you’re being sarcastic or not, but no, you shouldn’t.

    Some people struggle to get up for whatever reason, some people struggle to use a toilet for whatever reason, some people struggle to tidy up for whatever reason, and all of those things and more are impossible for some, for whatever reason (especially when they don’t have a support network).

    Could someone not be doing any of those things because they’re “lazy” rather than because they’re neurodiverse and/or otherwise disabled? Maybe, but to assume that’s the case when there are millions of legit reason is a bad ableist take (from the people criticising you).

    Unless you’re specifically asking for help with tidying your room, those criticising you for how it looks are being unhelpful judgmental assholes, at best.

    • LordAmplifier@pawb.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      To be honest, I was being sarcastic with my last comment, but I really appreciate that you have such a compassionate attitude. I struggle with keeping my place clean and can only convince myself to tidy up for maybe an hour every few weeks, so I have sympathy for whoever took the photo in the OP. It’s far from problematic in my case because I just don’t have that much stuff, but I still feel ashamed when I look at a pile of boxes that I could’ve thrown away weeks ago or the layers of dust on my shelves. Even installing a new SSD in my computer (something I was really excited about) took me two or three weeks because, idk, I just couldn’t get up and do it even though I use my computer almost every day. Joking about it has become a coping mechanism.

      Anyway, I’m rambling. Thank you for being so kind :3

      • DessertStorms@kbin.social
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        ·
        edit-2
        1 year ago

        You’re welcome.

        And I know it’s easier said than done because I struggle with it too - but try to be kinder to yourself.

        Being diagnosed autistic as an adult explained so much of my life, as did understanding mental illness and neurodiversity more. Executive dysfunction on its own can wreak havoc on your life, never mind added depression, a bunch of PTSD and cPTSD, and physical disability… Realising that I wasn’t “lazy” like I’d been told all my life, but actually legitimately struggling with a whole load of obstructive shit (that leads to such nonsense as both hoarding tendencies and OCD, as well as like you, keeps me from things I actually want to do because just getting to it is too difficult for reasons), has helped a lot towards at least trying to not be so hard on myself, though the negative voices these kinds of judgmental comments leave to knock about in your brain stay there like a live in bully that’s really hard to silence (edit to clarify: because internalising it means it becomes your own voice in your head bullying you).

        Which is why I hate it so much when people make them. They have no idea what the person they’re judging is dealing with, and unless they’re going to be there to help every day to keep on top of things, or at the very least pay for a cleaner and some therapy, they should just shut up.