I like to use “Top of X” a lot 🤔

we should ignore the “advice” from reddit that tells us that people are too stupid to sign up for anything

Definitely agree. The problem is just when someone in the past said “you should join <forum x>!”, you were always able to just immediately go to forum x’s signup page and sign up. But if someone hears of Lemmy, and goes to join-lemmy.org, there is no way to go to a signup page directly. They have to first learn about the multiple servers, and choose one. I think a “fast join” button like you say should be fine, and immediately next to it something to catch all the advanced actually curious users with something like a “advanced sign-up”

In lemmy-ui we have a post-deduplicator for feeds

That’s weird, because that’s exactly from where I’m coming from, I’m always using the lemm.ee website directly on all my devices, and I constantly see duplicate posts.

Copying historical content and rewriting history isn’t possible in a federated system

I have less knowledge of this topic so I’ll defer to you, but I have the feeling this may not be true. You might of course not be able to ensure consistency between all instances, ensure that it’s been changed everywhere, but I really can’t see why this is any different than “editing” a comment’s content or a post title, which is already possible. Why wouldn’t it be possible to “edit” the comment/post author in exactly the same way?

Thanks for your response and all you’re doing!

That’s why no one suggested “simply consolidating”. I didn’t suggest any solution at all. I’m just posing a question of if this actually pretty big problem is attempted to be handled.

gives a prepopulated list

The official one also does that. I’m talking about choosing a username, password, and email maybe, and then clicking register, and being done. No thinking involved.

Crossposts only show up once on the default UI

False, you get links to the other posts, of which you posted a screenshot, but each post is handled as being completely separate. If you are in the subscribed, local or all feeds, you would see all of these posts separately. Have you really never noticed scrolling by “the same” post multiple times? You have to go to each post manually to get all the comments to the “same” thing.

but Mastodon doesn’t allow it either […] due to technical limitations

Yes, I know that. But I’m also a programmer and I know that “technical limitations” is mostly a term for “that’s how we started it and it would be too costly to solve now, so we’ll just dismiss it” and not for actual limitations (i.e. not technically possible). It’d maybe require breaking changes of some kind or some kind of annoying backwards compatibility workaround, but that is why I’m asking. I’m not completely familiar with activity pub, but there’s likely some key used to verify posts/messages are made by a certain user, and there’s currently no way to transfer or change that key to a new account. But it seems very technically possible to me, and also possible without massive security issues. So that was my question, is there any plans to do this or no?

Are there any plans to deal with the most common annoyances regarding Lemmy? In my opinion these are all based on federation:

1. Some completely automated way for users to join Lemmy. Yeah, it’s not hard to select a server and it’s a “good thing to do”, but it’s still better to give people the option to go for convenience instead of the “proper” path. Maybe some kind of system where instances sign up for this general, convenience way of signing up, and the registered users just get automatically distributed evenly across those instances.
2. Duplicate post aggregation. The nature of federation will always make it make sense to have duplicate communities, but this will also make posts with the same links, same images, same videos, etc show up in people’s “all” feeds multiple times. It is technically possible to algorithmically detect these duplicates and offer users a UI option (not actual backend merge) to merge them all visually into one post.
3. A way to backup your whole user data and completely restore it on any instance you want. If an instance goes under, it should be possible to keep all subscriptions, all your posts, all your comments, and migrate them to a new instance.

No, you need to conform to the majority, differences only cause unpredictability and thus unsafetyness.

This is sarcasm, but it’s what many people actually think.

In case of OP, it’s self-loathing

Are you sure men are not subjected to something similar? Granted, no random women came to me on the street, but I received all kinds of weird “advice” by distantly acquainted women as a young man, which in all honesty also felt like “pressuring me to conform to female desire”

Rin grew on me in my old days.

I’m not sure how to argue with this except with “I have done this so many times and never received another answer”. I had no friends.

No, actually, the answer will still be the “yes”. However, what happens after is by no means guaranteed and I’ll make no comments on.

I wonder why no one suggested yet to just go to a group that looks cool and say “hey, I’ve come here alone and want to meet people, would you mind if I join you?” and the answer will almost always be a resounding “yes” and you will be adopted.

Idk, maybe being ready to burn books that go against your ideology registers different for other people, but for me it’s pretty far on the “bad” scale.

I don’t really have a problem with the being pressured into something, but the exact topic talked about here seems pretty extreme. Of course I don’t expect anyone to be a paragon of virtue, but I just wanted to say that someone that burns books would not be something I’d like to associate with, and I expected that that sentiment was pretty universal

I mean, for them, lying would actually be better, if they don’t understand they have a problem and are trying to fix it. Obviously for literally everyone else it would be better if they were honest.

Because if they don’t understand that it’s a problem and they’re trying to fix it, then by being honest they would simply be advertising that they’re a shitty person. Shitty people advertising that they’re shitty don’t get very far, they have to be dishonest about their shittyness for anyone to associate with them.

And believe me, there are a lot of shitty people that are reaaaally good at lying, most often because they are able to successfully deceive themselves and thus actually believe what they’re lying about. I mean how often have you heard that someone “wants to change” but doesn’t actually do anything about it? That is lying.

The only real solution is to not be shitty anymore, which is why I said, when someone understands what they’re doing is a problem and tries to fix it, then it’s completely fine again.

Hypothetical scenarios are still fun to think and talk about.

The problem is that the truth is pretty damning imo, like if they’re able to participate in actual book burning they don’t believe in and basically burn $300, I wonder what other dishonest thing they would do just to be liked. Not really something you want to be around.

I’d only be fine if they honestly explained that they knew it is a problem and they’re trying to fix it.

I mean there’s no way to “salvage” it, because buying $300 worth of books for intolerant book burning you don’t really believe in does reveal you to actually have no principles and to want do a lot just to be liked.

The best thing to say is to explain exactly that and genuinely express that you understand it is a problem and you’re working on it, which of course anon couldn’t because there’s no indication of this level of self-awareness.

But if they would, they might still be shunned, but it is very unlikely imo. Good people understand trauma and appreciate trying to work through it.

idk which game you are playing, but in dota, really no one is a “healer”, except maybe Io. Even stuff like Dazzle/Chen/Treant who actually have a lot of heal, it’s not the main thing they’re about.

My main role is support and I’ve only very rarely got the behavior you’re talking about. I even often get recognized after the game for clutch plays. I don’t think playing support in dota is tough nor ungrateful.

But also I’m playing on EU on pretty low to average MMR, idk how it is on other regions/skill levels.

I mean I can imagine the dating prospects are really terrible in the countryside, noone talked about that yet.