To be fair “non-harassing way” is a bit subjective. I’ve seen dudes have success with methods that I would consider “harassing”. I’ve also seen guys condemned as creeps for approaching women at what I’d consider a reasonable time & place.
And the loudest most unreasonable people on both sides dominate the narrative online, which makes the whole topic seem more fraught to young guys than it really is in real life.
The truth is one person’s “playful teasing” is another person’s “harassment”. You have to develop your sense of empathy and feel it out on a case by case basis. Pretending this black and white doesn’t help anybody.
To be fair “non-harassing way” is a bit subjective. I’ve seen dudes have success with methods that I would consider “harassing”. I’ve also seen guys condemned as creeps for approaching women at what I’d consider a reasonable time & place.
Yep; and this is a big problem of mine. As I’m quite pessimistic my default assumption is that a simple greeting is likely to result in a negative reaction.
A similar problem is approaching individuals / groups (for whatever reason) in general: are they free to talk to or is that a closed group who would feel bothered? Hard to see from the outside.
You have to develop your sense of empathy and feel it out on a case by case basis. Pretending this black and white doesn’t help anybody.
I agree. And as long as a no is respected promptly, no harm should be done by trying. But tell this my anxiety…
Go to the hardware store and pick out light bulbs. It’s annoying because there are so many different kinds. You’ll end up standing there and talking to several people over a 15 minute period, commiserating over lightbulbs mostly. Some of them will be attractive women. There’s your jumping off point.
The probability of success of that method is directly proportional of the average talkativeness of the local culture. If you are somewhere where everyone is commonly minding their own business, then yea, good luck :/
But what is the alternative, huh? Going outside and approaching someone (in a non-harassing way)? That would be madness.
To be fair “non-harassing way” is a bit subjective. I’ve seen dudes have success with methods that I would consider “harassing”. I’ve also seen guys condemned as creeps for approaching women at what I’d consider a reasonable time & place.
And the loudest most unreasonable people on both sides dominate the narrative online, which makes the whole topic seem more fraught to young guys than it really is in real life.
The truth is one person’s “playful teasing” is another person’s “harassment”. You have to develop your sense of empathy and feel it out on a case by case basis. Pretending this black and white doesn’t help anybody.
Yep; and this is a big problem of mine. As I’m quite pessimistic my default assumption is that a simple greeting is likely to result in a negative reaction. A similar problem is approaching individuals / groups (for whatever reason) in general: are they free to talk to or is that a closed group who would feel bothered? Hard to see from the outside.
I agree. And as long as a no is respected promptly, no harm should be done by trying. But tell this my anxiety…
Yeah I just don’t talk to women out of fear of being sued
Call the rental girlfriend hotline
Go to the hardware store and pick out light bulbs. It’s annoying because there are so many different kinds. You’ll end up standing there and talking to several people over a 15 minute period, commiserating over lightbulbs mostly. Some of them will be attractive women. There’s your jumping off point.
Can’t confirm, last time I picked out lightbulbs I dawdled for quite a long time and didn’t talk with anyone.
The probability of success of that method is directly proportional of the average talkativeness of the local culture. If you are somewhere where everyone is commonly minding their own business, then yea, good luck :/
happy roomba day!
Thanks, I guess :D Can you explain the roomba joke to me?
Ahh, you one of these fancy people who own a multi-story roomba xD
Mine looks like a cake
Makes me wonder if it's font specific or theme specific.
It also depends on the client.